I’m trying like hell to think what I should say in my two speeches tomorrow to be inducted into the Munster Hall of Fame. Typically, I just bullshit my way through every situation, but Billy Baker gave me pre-admonishment.
Until Baker said that, it was pretty much my plan to just show up and start talking. We are trapped in the Now, remember. That’s all I have is the Now. I talk on the radio to seven or eight people and then a couple more watch me on Facebook Live and Twitter. In the evenings, I write about My Radio Life to the three of four of you. I write it through without editing and then all of us go to bed.
Not together. We don’t all go to bed together. I go to my bed with Alexis and you go to be with whomever you go to bed with. All we have is the Now. We are trapped in it.
So tonight I ran around Wicker Park to clear my head and think about what I might have to say of the least bit importance to a couple thousand high school kids. What could I possibly tell them that could keep their attention for 5-7 minutes that they might take away and use later?
Here’s how this schedule goes.
Noon – tour Munster High School with the nine other inductees.
2pm – talk to the whole school
4pm – an induction dinner at the Arts Center (another speech)
8pm – announced at halftime of Lake Central at Munster football game
Then, since my brother’s in town and I’ve got a total of 34 people coming to the induction dinner, we’ll probably get together. I feel like a fake right now. I’d much rather be waking up tomorrow, ride my bike to the radio station, do a show, go work out, come back to work and do a JED in the Money segment on Facebook Live, work on some tech stuff, go home, eat dinner with Alexis, walk around Wicker Park. Go to bed with the three or four of you.
Let’s all go to bed together.
It doesn’t matter that we
Only know each other through our
Travels in the Now.
In the end, you only live once.
You might as well sleep with as
Many people as you can.
…. I apologize to the three or four of you for creating only half of a shitty poem. My wife and daughter keep coming into the bedroom where I’m sitting on the bed with my laptop – We are trapped in the Now – and they’re trying on different outfits.
“Do you think this skirt is too short for the dinner?” my daughter asks.
“Should I wear this camosol?” my wife asks.
They’re asking each other. They know from experience that I don’t care what they wear. I don’t even care what I wear. I will wear an outfit that my daughters and wife picked out for me at Banana Republic a few weeks ago. I’ll go workout, put my clothes on, and go get embarrassed as a member of the third class of the Munster Hall of Fame.
... This has actually been a rather eventful week. Today, I went to the federal courthouse on Hohman Avenue in Hammond, just as I have been doing for the last nine days. Today, Lake County Sheriff John Buncich took the stand in his own defense. The feds charged him with bribery. They’re saying a couple of tow truck drivers paid him bribes so that they could get more lucrative towing contracts.
Buncich’s attorney, Larry Rogers, asked the 71-year-old Sheriff a bunch of questions that countered a lot of the fed’s case. For a while there, it started to look as if the Sheriff might have a pretty good defense. It really is a narrow reading of the events by the feds, and you have to ignore other possibilities to get it into your head that the Sheriff took bribes.
But as the day wore on, either I got really hungry and tired, or Larry Rogers droned on way too long. Either way, I left the courthouse in the evening feeling the same way as when I walked in, which is this – I have no freaking idea if Buncich is gonna get off or not. Both the prosecution and the defense have made good points. It’ll be interesting to see the jury’s decision.
My day went like this:
5:30am – radio show intro. This is when I ramble.
6:15am – Our football announcer, Brian Jennings, came in. We talked about the upcoming season. We also talked about doing the games on Facebook Live, which is changing everything.
7:30am – Board certified attorney David Gladish forgot to come in. He texted me later that he thought it was next week. Instead, I did a segment with my producers Ryan Walsh, Sam Michel, and Jimmy Mullaney. Make lemonade.
9am – I walk into the federal courtroom. John Buncich takes the stand. I took a bunch of notes and I could probably go into that… but I’m tired and I just want to go to bed with the three or four of you.
11am – I leave the trial and I hurry back to interview David White, the head of research at Arcelor Mittal, and Kelly Nissan, head of corporate communications. White went to Gavit and then Purdue and he’s worked in research at Arcelor for 33 years. Good interview.
Noon – I interview Dana Reynolds Pettit, otherwise known as Cracker Reynolds. She’s the head of human resources at Horseshoe Casino. She just wrote a book called “The Highmore Circle.” It’s a story about six women who are dealing with losing their moms, at various stages of their lives. “Highmore” is a euphemism for “Highland,” where Dana grew up. Her nickname at Highland was “Cracker,” hence the pen name. Cracker, like David White and Kelly Nissan, was a good interview. The three or four of you should watch it in bed together on Facebook Live.
12:45 – I walk back into the courtroom of Judge James Moody and watch Buncich testify.
2:45pm – I leave the courtroom of Judge James Moody. The judge and federal prosecutor Phil Benson and defense attorney Larry Rogers spend a lot of time in conference arguing legal things, which takes away from the testimony of the Sheriff.
3:45pm – I get a call from Pete Korellis, who owns a roofing company. He lives across the street. There’s a mixup and he’s at the Center for Visual and Performing Arts looking for the Hall of Fame induction ceremony.
“Oops. It’s tomorrow,” I tell him.
6:30pm – I JEDgolf. That’s when I take a 7-iron and two golf balls and run around Wicker Park playing golf. There’s a whole bunch of guys near the first tee, like “Kat Man,” “Gumby,” Kuna, Bridges and more. They yell out funny things at me as I tee of and run down the first fairway.
There’s a perfect moment in here, by the way.
There’s not enough perfect moments in life.
When you get one, roll it up and put it in
Your pocket and write about it later.
It might be all smushed up by then, but
At least you’ll have something to tell
Anyways, as the three or four of you know, the golf course kind of wraps around the Wicker Park Social Center. And as I was coming up the second fairway, a band started playing Steely Dan songs. The band is called “Deacon Blues” and the whole time I ran and played golf, they played, “Josie” and “Rikki, Don’t Lose that Number” and other Steely Dan hits.
There was a purple sunset and green grass. The Borman Expressway (80-94) sat in the distance, and Region Rats walked on the path that circles the golf course. “Deacon Blues” serenaded me while I shot an easy 45 for nine holes with one club. This is a perfect moment that not even threats from North Korea and Lake County political corruption can take away.
I can’t go to bed with the three or four of you right now. My daughter and wife are here and they want me to put on what I’m going to wear tomorrow to get inducted into the third class of the Munster Hall of Fame. After that we can all go to bed together, so just wait.